A Bright Light In the Dark

I easily (and nostalgically) recall the days before the pornography flood rolled in and so badly damaged so many in its wake. The privilege of my having grown up in the seventies and eighties (besides the excellent rock and roll) is that I know who we all were before the "porn as normal" deluge hit. I knowwhat courtship, dating and real, relational sex looks and feels like, both personally and from other singles and couples I know.

What has been exceptionally difficult is working with young women in their 20's and 30's who contact me for private sessions to help them to work through the discovery of sex addiction/compulsion in their primary relationships. Heartbreakingly, very few of these young women feel they have any ground to stand on to evencontemplate a life that is free of the influence of pornography.

They have nearly given up finding a life partner who does not defend the use of pornography and strip clubs as socially-acceptable forms of entertainment, to say nothing of all the other behaviors that are so often labeled as "explorations" of a rich sexual life. Nothing, and I mean nothing fuels my passion for the work I do more than experiencing the depths of my rage about this unspeakably horrible phenomenon.

And just when I think it can't be done, that it's just too difficult to ask these young women to imagine a different reality without having any reference points to guide them, along comes Hollie McNish, a brilliant, young woman from the UK who has found the strength, clarity and courage to speak her truth about the feelings of isolation and the loss of intimacy in her generation. She does so as a much-loved and awarded Spoken Word artist.

So let me introduce Hollie McNish, and may I suggest wearing some earbuds and turning up your volume. What she has to say will command your rapt attention.

Thank you, Hollie, on behalf of every partner of a sex addict; we are most grateful to you.

Take a look at Hollie's inspiring video below!